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29 Questions…..

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If you’ve ready my last post by now – you know what the number 29 means to me.

My sister Shannette died when she was ONLY 29.  I was 18.  I’m 29 now.  We were 11 years apart.  I was just entering the adult world – when she was just leaving.  So many things I wish I knew about her – So many questions I wish I could ask her.

Maybe some of her friends know.  It’d be nice for them to answer.  Maybe they will….


  1.  What’s your favorite color?

  2. Whats your favorite food?

  3. Would you have tried out for ANTM if you had the chance?

    I remember that you had dreams of being a model. The only issue was – you were short! I’m 5’5 and I remember you were shorter than ME! Tyra actually had a season where they featured models under 5’7.  I know you would’ve done so well.

  4. Do you know how much I looked up to you? I want(ed) to be just like you.

  5. Why did you give up Susie?

    I always wondered.  You could’ve kept snoop. Nobody liked her. Susie was my dog. I wish I had a picture of her. I think most of my Childhood friends know and remember Susie. (Hey – TayBae do you remember when we tried Susie’s dog biscuits ? Taste just like Cheerios I swear ! )  Susie was a cocker spaniel / pincher mix that my sister Shannette adopted from an animal shelter. She was well behaved , playful and had so much personality.

  6. Why didn’t you just keep Snoop?

Snoop was a miniature Doberman. I think my sister paid cash money for that headache. I couldn’t stand her. Too hyper , too hype , literally always lit. Susie couldn’t stand her either.



It’s really hard to write these without a face full of tears. It’s been 11 years and I still can’t think of you without my eyes starting to tingle.


7. What advice would you give me about Love?

One thing I remember you telling me that stuck with me. ” DO NOT GET MARRIED BEFORE YOU ARE 25!” You meant that shit too 😂😂 I know that you would have so much to tell me about that. I wish I could’ve been there for you. A shoulder to lean on , but we are so many years apart. I’m sure there was a story behind that quote. Lets just move on to number 8.

8.  Girl – lacefronts , closures : Girl – I would just love to know your thoughts on them lol.

I’m sure you would’ve MASTERED Sew-Ins by now!! I remember you were working on perfecting your Sew-ins. I was thankfully your test dummy. I loved my hair for prom. It was so different from the normal prom “up-do”. Girllllll you were ahead of your time. I remember when daddy built your shop. “Distinguished Styles ” Remeber you were trying to move away from those HARD SPRITZ STYLES! “Nice soft flowing curls” I remembered you would say. Girl that’s all these heffas want now!!!!! It’s so funny – they were sleeping on you. I can relate SOOOOO MUCH!!!

9. What’s your liquor of choice ?

I remember the 1st time you let me baby sit my nephew Torrence alone, I think I was about 14.  Terrance had left a Budweiser beer out on the table. I wanted to sip it sooooooo bad – but i was afraid that i’d be TOO DRUNK to take care of my 1 year old nephew Torrence. Lmbooo. Drunk off a hot, flat, budweiser. Clearly I didn’t know anything about alcohol!

Lmbooo….This is what I thought would get my DRUNK! Kids!

I had my first drink with you and Terrance (her husband at the time) at 15 or 16 I think. It was a 6-pack of smirnoffs. The green apple kind. Them thangs was SO GOOD ! I remember drinking the whole 6 pack. I was so tipsy lol.

I remember Terrance saying that you could drink him under the table. Is this true? I remember you telling me how you know you’ve made it to your “limit”. You said your lips would start tingling. That stuck with me! I remember once I got to college – I tried to figure out “Ok. What’s my sign that I’ve reached my limit.” Unfortunate (or not lol.) it took me quite a few parties to figure that out. ( Goodness – I thank God for Tanisha ! Chileeeee the stories !) I can tell when I’ve had too much once my tongue feels like it’s tripping on itself.

10.  What were your goals?

What else did you want to accomplish in life?  I know you had so much more that you wanted to do with your life.

11.  What would be your advice to me on friends??

I remember you and mom would talk about some of the things you went went through with your friends.  Something that I noticed about you now looking back. You did NOT hang with a large crowd.  Your circle was really small and even then – sometimes you walked alone.  I find myself in that same position and I can’t even lie at times it’s tough.  At times I miss having that large circle of friends like I did in highschool – but then I remember the drama that can come with that.  You would be so happy to know how much your friends reach out to me, encourage me.

Maui has been especially supportive.  She is the main reason that I decided to really pursue sewing and designing for others. You’d be sooo proud of her as well.  She’s doing some really amazing things empowering women. My very first fashion show was Maui’s 1st annual Life Styled Event .

Shannette and her BFF Maui

12.  Who did you look up to?

13.  Did you realize so many people looked up to you?

I made a post yesterday and the response was overwhelming honestly. People that I didn’t even know – KNEW you – told stories of thier experience with you. Everyone things you’re so damn cool!


14.  What are your fears?

I wonder if they are the same as mine…not reaching your goals..Not being successful.

15.  When you were little, what did you want to be?

Did you always want to be a cosmetologist? I wish you were still here to slay my hair. Selfish I know. But I know I wouldn’t go a DAY without my hair being ON POINTTTTTTTTTTT. And if i did – it was becuase you were mad at me and not talking to me. You were really good at that lmboo!!

16.  What’s your most embarrassing childhood memory?

17.  What do you love about yourself most?

18. Where did SweetPea come from?

19.  How many tattoo’s did you have?

I have 2 so far. I want to get another with the sickle cell anemia ribbon. In honor of you of course. <3

20.  What made you get into the TV show “Friends” ?

I’ve tried to watch it SEVERAL times over the years. I just don’t get why you loved it so much.  I remember you used to watch it so much that TORRENCE at 1 years old used to do that little “Double clap” with the theme song. Lol. That was so funny.

21.  Who influenced you the most?

What was your inspiration when you were feeling uninspired?

22.  Have you ever tried Mary J?

You know – Georgia has made small breakthroughs as far as marijuana for medicinal purposes. Every time I hear a new update about it I’m like “Dang, Shawn would’ve been able to benefit from this. I wonder if it would be helpful to her. ”

(If I haven’t mentioned it. My sister had Sickle Cell Anemia.)

23.  Do you remember that time you threw that orange at me?

I don’t even remember what I did. You were like 17 or 18 at the time.  I remember you were still in highschool.  I swear it was sooo easy for me to get under your skin lol. How you let a 6 year old get to you lol.

24. Did you enjoy walking me to school my 1st year?

I surely did.  Thats the benefit of living in a small town I suppose. The elementary school was right beside the highschool at the time.  I loved walking with my big sister. Sucks that we only had 1 year together of you walking me to school. I enjoyed it so much though.

25.  What would you say was the HAPPIEST moment of your life?

26.  What was the saddest moment of your life?

27.  What made you come to my graduation?

We weren’t talking at all at the time. I know exactly why. We were agruing and I got flip at the mouth and called you a Bitch.  Do I regret it? Yes. But not because you weren’t being a Bitch because you were lol. I should have had more respect for you as my sister.  I’m lucky I didn’t try that with our sister Monique. I already know she would’ve read me my rights.

My sister Mo’ is sweet as can be – But will read you to FILTH in the most eloquent way possible if you force her hand.


Which is why I didn’t get any pictures with you unfortunately.  I can remember it like it was yesterday.  I was sitting on the front Row because I was an honor graduate.  I remember sitting looking at all of the people moving around like little ants trying to get settled in thier seats.  Then I see you.  I wanted to cry.  We hadn’t been talking for about a month I think.  I was shocked you came. That is a moment that I will never forget. Seeing you taking a seat at MY graduation.

I remember once I got back home that night – I thought everything was cool. I was like “Hey. Girlllll.  I’m glad you came.”

I’m all like “Girlll come give me a hug”

Your response:

Lmbooo! I swear!


I mean…I did call you out of your name. So I get it.


28.  Do you feel bad that we didn’t talk a lot your last few months on this earth?

I don’t. And you shouldn’t either.  We are sisters – we are going to disagree – we are going to get upset with eachother – we are going to say things we DONT MEAN. At the end of it all though, you and my sister Mo’ always come through for me when I need you most.  So the pettiness – nah I’m not holding a grudge over that. And remember – we did make up before you passed away.  So it’s ok – we ended on very good terms.


29.  What is the most self-less thing that you’ve ever done?

I’m not sure what your answer would be – but I would have to say it would be giving my niece Taylor life – in exchange for your own.  I love my little niece and wouldn’t trade her for the world. She’s you all over again. I mean she literally looks exactly like you.  She’s so beautiful , so smart, and has so much personality.  I think you knew that this pregnancy was a risk – but life is about taking risks I suppose.  I just wish that you had more time with her.


Life is so short. And 29 isn’t old.



One thought on “29 Questions…..

  1. Trina, this is so emotional. I pray you feel peace when you remember your sister. Her legacy definitely leaves on . Remain Blessed.

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